Tag Archives: pains

The Perks (and pains) of Being an Only Child

Inspiration came at the unlikeliest and weirdest of places. I’ll keep the location to myself. Sorry. Hehe. The point here is I was struck by sudden inspiration, and here I am writing about it.

Few months back I started my #bloggerdreams by talking about the ups and downs of being single. After a relatively long hiatus, it seems fitting that for my “comeback” I write something related to my first post. Heck, maybe I’ll even make this into a series. Haha.

People often get surprised when they learn that I am an only child. This may be because its normal to have siblings and it’s quite “rare” to be the only one. When the initial surprise wears off, (which happens quite quickly) the questions start. “Spoiled ka siguru ne?”, “E makaynip?”, “Nanung feeling?” I also get reactions ranging from envy, “Apa ika ala kang kasamsaman” to pity “Ay, ikang dili mo, kalungkot naman.” After years of these questions and reactions, I’ve become immune to them. I don’t give it much thought anymore. My general response is to smile, it can be a fake one, or genuine depending on my mood.

For those who were blessed (ahmm.. blessed ba talaga? Haha.) with siblings, it can be hard to imagine or understand how being an only child is. Guess that justifies the curiosity. This is for you guys, I’ll try to answer the questions you asked and maybe even the ones you haven’t even thought of. Alright let’s do this! Perks and Pains style.

Being an only child taught me how to be independent. I can go to places, eat, and do my errands alone without feeling uncomfortable or sorry for myself. I am not a hermit or anti social, I understand the appeal of having people around,  I know it is more fun to do things with friends, but what I don’t understand is why some people always need someone to be with them to do things. Ali la maka kimut  na ilang dili. 

The thing about being independent is that since I’m more used to dealing with just myself, I’m quite unsure as to how to deal with other people. When in company of strangers I don’t speak unless spoken to. I am not sure what to say or how to act,  so it’s better safe and silent. This often comes across as me being snobbish, trust me, that is one thing that I am not. I’m just  socially awkward.

Alright, next up is one of the frequently asked questions. Here is my answer. Yes I am spoiled. I know people tend to have a negative connotation about this word so I’ll make myself clear. Nope, I did not get all that I wanted. I am not spoiled that way. I am spoiled with attention,  never had compete for it.  “Aku ing bida”

I’d like to think that I am more mature now and I am way over this, but  when I was younger (like two years ago, when I was 18. Hehe.) I did not appreciate it when I had to share the attention. I turn into this green monster and destroy everything. Haha. That would have been exciting if it were true, but in those situations I just kept what I was feeling to myself.

Another thing that I like about being an only  child is that it gave me a chance to choose who my brothers and sisters will be.  I did not get them by default of  having the same parents. The siblings I have now, I was able to gain through the years of my life. They are my close friends, brothers and sisters from other parents. We may not be related by blood, but we are connected by soul. (#medyopadeep Haha.)

Having siblings has been one of my dreams before. Being an only child does get lonely at times, I just choose not dwell on it.  I’ve accepted and embraced the fact that I am the only one and I’m cool with that.  Especially  since I can choose who I like to be my siblings. Unfortunately having the power to pick them does not give me the ability to make them stay, that will be their choice. Win some, lose some. That’s life.

Being on only child can either be a blessing or a curse depending on your attitude towards it.  It has it perks, it has its pains just like everything else in the world.  God choose to give me this blessing and I am grateful for it. Why? well for one thing it gave me the inspiration to write again! That is it for now, but there may be a part two. Abangan.  Hehe.



Peace out!